&*%%$^!### toilet paper dispenser!!!!
The very last thing I want to do on Friday at 5pm is take my final bathroom break of the day, only to find that the freakin’-frackin’ toilet paper dispenser will only give me one tiny shred of tissue at a time. That primal-sounding scream you just heard? Was me. I just injured myself — bloodied myself, even — to get the HUGE roll of toilet paper out of the &*%%$^!### dispenser, just so I could get more than one sheet. It wouldn’t even turn! It’s just the absolute last frustration I need at the end of a stressful week. Thank GOD it’s Friday, people.
Filed under indignities, me | Comments (2)If my head weren’t attached…
I often make jokes about how forgetful I am. I think I get so wrapped up sometimes in the little things, that I neglect the big picture, usually to my own detriment.
A couple of weekends ago, I had to run over to RC’s for some vehicular-type help. I called him around 7pm to see if he was free, and he suggested I come on over while the girls were having their evening snack. I hung up, grabbed my purse and keys, and headed out. I visited for a few minutes, and left their house around 8 or 8:30.
So, on my way home I decide to call my mom to chat, except I notice there’s a voice mail… from my friend Dawn. It seems that one of my neighbors left her a message — from MY home telephone — stating that they found this telephone at the corner of my street, but they didn’t know who it belonged to. She was actually afraid something had happened to me… kidnap, perhaps? Anyway, I couldn’t imagine how it got to that corner! Did I leave it outside? Did I… oh, wait. I bet I put it on the trunk when I hung up, and it just didn’t fall off until I turned that corner. Great. I am a winner!
I get home after talking to Dawn and finding out that the people didn’t indicate where they lived, only where they had found the phone. I was all set to knock on doors, when I noticed the oddest pair of teenage boys sort of hanging out around that corner. Turns out they had my phone, and I got the strangest feeling that they were expecting some kind of reward… they were just really weird kids. But, phone returned, I was just glad I didn’t have to post pictures of it. Can you imagine?
PR5 - Episode One
I have no intention of recapping Project Runway; there are others already taking up that gauntlet, and they do a far better and more entertaining job than I ever could. That being said… I caught the season 5 premiere lastnight, and have just a few questions and comments.
Heidi Klum, why must you yell at the contestants? I don’t know if it was terribly windy on the Atlas rooftop, or what, but Frau Klum was entering a vocal range reserved only for naughty prison inmates, not only in volume, but in tone, too. She was kind of barking at them. I’ll forgive her, though, because she and Tim Gunn make such a cute couple. I love Tim Gunn… I’m glad this season started so soon after the last, because I was beginning to miss him.
I usually form some opinions of the contestants early on (who doesn’t), and so far the only ones I really don’t like are Daniel — he looks too unkempt and greasy to me to be in fashion; Stella — she seems really hardcore, and also very one-note; Suede — anyone who refers to himself in the third person needs to GET OUT; and Blayne — he just scares me with the tanning addiction… melanoma, anyone? I liked Korto — she seems really down-to-earth, and I’m excited to see what she does the rest of the season; I also liked Kenley — not for any particular reason, other than her style aesthetic; Emily; and Jennifer — I don’t think she’ll last, but I liked some of the designs they showed during the intro.
I thought it was so cool to hearken back to the beginning of the series with this week’s challenge, but I could not believe how lame most of the designs were. The plastic cup dress by Daniel was kind of inspired, and while Korto’s was just another tablecloth among many I did like what she did with the produce. I was terribly dismayed that given $75 the best thing Stella could come up with was black trash bags. And not even high quality trash bags… the el cheapo brand. I thought Jerry basically copped out completely; thank god he has a real job, with an already established line of his own.
And Austin Scarlett! He’s precious. He wears more makeup and has prettier hair than any woman I know. It was good to see him, with that crazy fedora. I’m looking forward to the rest of the season… I may not post about it every week, but I’ll definitely have something to say, I’m sure.
